A Tribute to Jane Austen

Sunday, January 30, 2011

A story..

Okay... I know that I kept on writing blog that was not exciting or such. Some even fall asleep to even read my blog...
So, I try to make it interesting... I'll put a story every week, or poem. Which ever I feel I like the most. It might be love, or horror..
it might be my life and also fantasy. So here goes... My first story in my blog..(QUICK!!! TAKE A PICTURE!!! Hahahaha!! kidding!)

Title: My memory of you
Song: (Suggestion are needed!)

 The star, So beautiful. Shining away at night. Giving people the feeling of being part of this universe. As I looked up in the sky, for the last time, I started to remember the memory of Me and Him..

3 Years ago..

He was beautiful.. his short coal black hair, his snow white skin and his sweetness. They're really stood out! Even though people  noticed him, but I notice him more than any other people I know. I love his smile, his sweet ringing voice every time he spoke to his best friends. To tell you the truth.. I love him, since high school. Thanked God, I got the same college as him.
Then, he was approached by some girl.  I know she was up to no good. Because, she was a player. I saw her going out with different set of guys!
I need to protect him from her. I need to tell him that I love him!
So I've become another friend to him. I give him advice and warn him about the girl.. But it seems that he was happy, I can not bear the thought of him denying  me as her friend. I dreaded it! Every time he came to see me, my skipped a beat. I thought I was going to die every time he came near me. but every time he started to speak of that girl, my heart shattered. I almost cried of heart broken.

2 Years ago..
He already broke up with that snake, He was in pain. I tried to console him, so I brought him out to a field that night. It was a beautiful night. The dark sky filled with stars!! My heart felt relieve to see his smile!!
Yes, That's it.
His smile that can light up my darkness. I know that instant, he was already over him. It's time for me to say I love you to her.
But it can wait. I thought we're just going to be friends, but he confess to me. He love me!! OMG!! We started to go out and I was incredibly happy!

6 month ago...
He's starting to avoid me. Every time I want to talk to him he said he was busy. I can still accept a week that he was busy, but he didn't talk to me for almost a month! I cannot bear the thought of losing him! I love him! But what shattered me the most was not the fact that he ignored me, but he kissed another girl in front of me. we broke up that instant. I never want to see him ever again.

a month ago..
 For months I didn't came out from my room. my parents started to worry that I might do something stupid. i love him so much! I still am. Why does he do this to me? My friends came and encourage me to forget about him and find some new one to get over him. Easy for them to say it, I love that Bastard! Even though he had hurt me so bad. But their right its time to go out again.

3 days ago...
Doesn't matter how much I tried to forget about him. I just can't.. I went to the field that we used to see the stars together. I thought I was alone there, but I saw someone in a wheel chair. That person, I knew him. I went and I was really surprised. It was him!! He looked so different! His short black hair was no more! His skin, is paler than before! He looked like he haven't eaten in months! He smile weakly at me! I can't bear the looks of him, I broke down and cried like a baby! He just gently patted me on the head.
"Don't cry baby.. I miss you so much." he said.
"How?? your sick? Why didn't you tell me?" I said in between sobs. He just smile at me and asked me to hug him.
He whisper lightly to my ear,
"Dear... I love you with all my heart, know that I did what I did was because I don't want you to keep remembering me. can you accompany me in watching the star together?" I just nodded, I watched the stars with him. remembering all those years back when we're together.
"Hey, Do you still remember that star?"
"Yeah.. I do, Its our star. Remember it and I will always be right by your side, loving you."
"I hope that when I died I could be near to you and our star.." I got no respond, I touched his hands. It was cold.. I cried and cried.. hugging him, and seeing him for the last time..
"I Love You, Forever and Always!"

 The star, I love to watch it every night. Why?? Cause I know that I have someone up there watching over me and loving me as I love him..

Friday, January 28, 2011

BGR talk in SFX

Okay... for those who do not know wat BGR is, its a talk..
A talk about boy girl relationship..
the one who organise it is SFX church... Man!! it is very interesting to hear their love stories!!
some can even be made to books!!
I now what ur thinking.... another overrated story from a person.. well maybe it is...
But u see..
they were so sweet... very romantic in none offensive and hollywood type kinda way... they follow the will of god..
So cute, romantic and I think fulfilling kinda a way..
they said this..
"Boys should be more matured... take the lead in ur spiritual relationship."
"Girls, don't worry... God is writing ur love story.. u r made to b pursue, not pursueing.."
I can't describe everything here, u want to know more?? go la to a BGR talk...
I'm sure u will not regret it.. till I write again...Bye!!

Thursday, January 27, 2011

My View of Ponggal And Chinese new year

On the 26th and 27th, IPBA's cohort 5 had organised  celebrations. here's my view:
1. Only 10 days of practicing sumazau dance
2. Thank God sumazau was not that hard. we get the pattern in about 2 days training
3. practicing sumazau with my friends really did make me happy
4. By the practice, I got to know and have fun with flo and darryl the seniors.
5. I get to know better ronald, devan, and edwin.
6. I think i can communicate better with them
7. I love to ask them question
8. I love to know them better..
Till I write again.. Bye

Continue wit Y boys afraid of me

Okay I guess u already read my recent blog.. okay.. I just want to conclude the topic, as mention on top.
1. Im agrresive
2. Im not feminine
3. I always hit them ( only because they aren't serious in working their work. )
4. How I question them is like I challenged their rights as men.
5. I can do what they can't do
6. I have the spunk to speak out my opinion under certain circumstances. Like in class
7. They don't understand me.
8. they think I'm anti boys.. Which is really ridiculous
9.They don't like me being a teacher's pet
10. They just won't accept that every time I get something right, its because I read. They thing that I'm showing off.

In conclusion.. I do what most guys think that girls shouldn't do..
Hey, like they said in Social Studies.
Im a transgender.. I go out from the norm of the society..
Im proud to be different! till I write again.. Bye!

Wednesday, January 26, 2011

Re: My Live as a Nerd

Okay, As I promise... I would like to tell you what boys think of me..
first time I was in
Elementary school,

I was in third grade. There was this bully that would bully boys in the class. okay its a she.. the bully I mean.
okay, every time she entered the class, everyone would be scared.. becoz she's one of the teacher's pet.
Every time she hits a boy I would go and break up the fight.. (Thank God I was Born under a Libra sign.)
from that moment on I think I'm close to guys better than girls..

Secondary school

Guys ask me for advice about their love life.. as if I know what does it feels like to be in love..
so I just told them what i think and what i saw in the korean drama and thats good..
I think this is the part where boys scared of me..
I am violent.. always hit them.. soo.. I really think that is the reason..
it followed me all the way to high school and college..


I really think that some of the guys from my class are afraid of me, because I am too out spoken, authoritive and etc... all the traits that are present in guys.. I think i hv some of it..
maybe thats why they are afraid of me... its because im different than any other girls that they meet..
Well I don't care.. think what ever you want to think boys.. but what you see is what you get..
till I write again bye!!

Thursday, January 13, 2011

My life in general

Just got back from practicing some Christian song... I'm actually trying to say something to them, we sing in the name of Jesus! Stop tormenting our friends who wants to sing!!!
Well that's all I want to say actually... Bye!

Wednesday, January 12, 2011

The Life of someone

Last night, Met with the seniors who just got back from overseas.
My feelings???
Glad and Proud to be a Sabahan!! Why??? Because, I've got two seniors who just got back from overseas from Sabah bah.... Hahahahahahaha!!! No I'm not some racisms pig, but I'm still proud of them. They manage to preserve the way they talk, I mean their slang is still Sabahan. My God!!!! Finally got the chance to see and talk to some Sabahan seniors.... Thanks you guys!!!
By the way, my seniors from Sabah are..... wait if I told you wouldn't it be a surprised??
Any who I'm proud of them!! till I write again!!

My life in general as a nerd

And now I'm feeling like a furniture.... He use me whenever he wants, and forget bout me whenever he wants...
Stupid idiotic guy!!!I can't hate you, but I can still be mad at you...
He think I'm rugged... Yeah he's right.. Argh!!! I hate when he treats me like a piece of furniture!!! Let me tell you this,
I will not say I hate you, but that does not mean I can't get angry at you....
You know what???
This game????
Yeah!!! two can play at it!!! Bring it on!!!

Tuesday, January 11, 2011

My life in general

What do you think when someone said I like you and then said I like you like my best friend. FYI, he /she is you're crush that you have been trying to get over since You last saw them. That's what happened to me... Okay to tell you the truth, (I've been using 'to tell you the truth' a lot lately)My life is not that bad.. only my love life...
imagine, I'm 19 this year... never have any experience in dating....
talk about pathetic... I know...
At least my sibling and my cousins have experience in dating....
ARGH!!! MY LOVE LIFE IS SO PATHETIC!!!!! HELP ME!!!!! I've got the chance to have my first love...
I want my love, my first love to be something I want to remember for the rest of my life....
any who.... I'm just saying.... that be grateful...with your love life....
Me.... I think boys afraid of me..... why???? I'll tell you in the next post!! for now BUBYE!!

My Life As a Nerd

How do you response a proposal in the net??? I mean in FB??? Here I'm going out of my mind trying to think of the right answer for this kinda thing..
You know what he said....
After a few(A LOT)conversation with him, I settle down.
he said to be friends i obliege.
As much as It hurts me(I don't know, It does not hurt me much as I think it would hurt me. What is the hell wrong with me??)I do need to say it. I agree.
THE F****** word.
Me crying???
HAHAHAHAHAH!!! I don't see the point of me crying. Even though I kinda like him from the first time we sms...
But nevertheless.... I'm still young... If he can wait till his feeling develope... I can too
I'll Update another one later on.. Bye

Monday, January 10, 2011

My Life as a Nerd

Well.... today we have social studies.
interesting point to argue.... sexism and gender..
Gender is the traits that the society induce in you
Sex is biological traits, you're born with it..
What do you think about Nature and Nurture....
HAHAHAHAHA!!! think of it as my way of being a nerd!!
I know its really boring but think about it....
if your a girl, society wants you to act feminine
vise versa as a guy...
Well I would not want to go the society norm...
but to be honest..
I want to say to society...
Okay, I know this is all not making any sense...
But remember what you're reading now..
It's my blog..
I write what I want, make sense or not...
Till then bye!

My Life As a Nerd

Do you know what it feels like to live like a nerd??
Well I guess you don't. If you do, welcome to the same boat as me!! Okay, I wake up everyday at 6.30 am, take a bath, iron my cloths and take my breakfast.Same routine every single day. Boring isn't it? Being me... I know what you're thinking.
"Does she have any life at all?"
"Why does she even live?"
HAHAHAHAHA!!! for those who think like that, sorry but this is me... Boring little me... I mean, I like my life. Every little thing that I do, I like it. It's me. It's my way of showing the world that that is me. Even though some people might think that it's not important to what I do, I still appreciate it. Well to be straight I like my life, but I need a little bit of induce fun. Anywho, this is the place where I can just say what is in my mind. I really am thankful that someone invented a blog!